These are my confessions.
I have been avoiding this blog for a year because I have been hoping that MRKH hasn't defined my life. I think that I am lying to myself about that one. It has in many ways. I'm starting to think more about my sexuality and I am feeling more intersexed than ever. I do like men but I like women too. I haven't dated in about 3 years. My "sugar daddy" complicated relationship, ended this last week after 8 years. I know that there is a reason or a purpose to all of this but I am wondering what it is.
Will I ever feel that I fit in a real relationship?
Ok, let's take this one apart a little more.
I meet someone. We go on a date or two. We are attracted to each other.
I have to make sure that I am dilating (we may have sex at some point), ideally long before dating because it takes a while to be stretched.
I am getting anxiety about whether or not he will fit in the vaginal space.
I am getting anxiety about telling him.
I hope he doesn't want kids.
It's time to have sex. The moment is right.
I don't enjoy it as much as I think I should. It's kind of boring, really.
But I enjoy the foreplay and kissing.
That is life. It's good being alone in a lot of ways, but there are those times that I wish I could meet someone who gets it. It may be nice to date someone who is intersex too, that may be easier.
MRKH truth.
I have been avoiding this blog for a year because I have been hoping that MRKH hasn't defined my life. I think that I am lying to myself about that one. It has in many ways. I'm starting to think more about my sexuality and I am feeling more intersexed than ever. I do like men but I like women too. I haven't dated in about 3 years. My "sugar daddy" complicated relationship, ended this last week after 8 years. I know that there is a reason or a purpose to all of this but I am wondering what it is.
Will I ever feel that I fit in a real relationship?
Ok, let's take this one apart a little more.
I meet someone. We go on a date or two. We are attracted to each other.
I have to make sure that I am dilating (we may have sex at some point), ideally long before dating because it takes a while to be stretched.
I am getting anxiety about whether or not he will fit in the vaginal space.
I am getting anxiety about telling him.
I hope he doesn't want kids.
It's time to have sex. The moment is right.
I don't enjoy it as much as I think I should. It's kind of boring, really.
But I enjoy the foreplay and kissing.
That is life. It's good being alone in a lot of ways, but there are those times that I wish I could meet someone who gets it. It may be nice to date someone who is intersex too, that may be easier.
MRKH truth.
I just read your story, sounds just like mine. Unfortuatly I had stopped dilating because at the age of 17 I hadn't had a boyfriend and didn't believe it was the right time. Just about over a year ago I met this amazing guy. I built up the confidence to talk to him about my MRKH and I think he said he understood, but I really don't think he felt the way I did.
ReplyDeleteWe do have sex, but like you said I don't think I enjoy it as much as is to be expected. This past weekend was a big challenge in that part. We see each other once a week and I use that as my form of dilation now, but I don't think its enough. I don't think anyone will truly understand what we are going through emotionally and physically. I'm in the process of contacting my doctors at the U of M in Michigan and trying to consult with them to make sure that I'm still doing things right.
Feel free to email me with questions, I would like to talk to someone that is going through the same thing I am.
mscheele18@gmail.com
I want to talk you
ReplyDeleteDo you have an email that we can chat back and forth?
ReplyDeletemrkhlife@gmail.com
DeleteDo you have an email?
ReplyDeletemrkhlife@gmail.com
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteEver think of dating men with micro penises
ReplyDelete