I know more than I thought

I promised myself to dedicate one night a week for a while to learn more about sex.  I worked on reading the book I mentioned earlier.  Refreshingly, I realized that I know a lot more than I thought.  I have heard a lot of the material in the book before.  My problem is that I don't communicate with my lovers.  It's hard for me to open up and trust.  I am sure that I am not the only one out there, but I really do feel alone on that one.  I guess I am used to things coming easy for me; and this has definitely been a struggle for years.  It's something that I don't want to be an issue anymore so I am going to make a concerted effort to remove it as an issue for me.

With that, I need to work on attracting a soulmate.  I have a strong belief in the laws of attraction, and I am starting my work in that arena.  My experience has been that after I finish reading one of the books on the law of attraction for soulmates, a guy comes into my life.  My exboyfriend was one, and there are two guys who have come since then.  I am sure that one of them is not a match for me, but the other one may have some potential.  We'll see.

Oh, I commented on my last post about my mom's remark.  She told me a month ago that when I was a little baby, she noticed a single drop of blood in my diaper, which she noted as strange.  Her instincts tell her that this may have something to do with my MRKH--that it was some sort of a sign to her.  The reproductive system was sealing it's incomplete self off.  I don't know if I buy that explanation, but it was a bit touching to hear her describe that.

Later.

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