Sunday, December 26

The beginning: May 1998 continued

Ok...sorry about the delay in getting more of this out.

I'm sure you are very disappointed.

Back to the lovely gynecologist. So I left the visit totally crying and not fully understanding what was going on. I was a very private 16 year old girl. Crying was something I did not do in front of anyone other than family. I had to call my nurse practioner to figure out what was going on. She told me that my gynecology did not appear normal. My mom said my doctor was calling all over town to figure out what was going on. That made me feel much less like a freak, not.

I never went back to that doctor.

The nurse practioner gave me the name of this professor in Texas who knew about the condition, but the largest clinic in the metro area had no idea what do do with it. I didn't make that call to see anyone. At that point, I just tried to deal with the whole situation emotionally.

I think the most emotionally offensive test was the lab that made sure I was a girl. Seriously.

So by the time all of these tests concluded, as I mentioned, I was in college 200 miles away. I really knew myself well because I decided on my own to go get some counseling.

I spent over 3 years in counseling. It would continue really regularly for the first few months of college, and then I was weaned off it.

Amongst those great things I learned, were coping mechanisms to deal with these issues. My head did (and continues to) be a hinderance to full acceptance of this condition.

That's about all I have to say right now for the condition, diagnosis and whatnot. Now it's time for some of the emotional wrangling discussion. That's what I've been dealing with for 13 years now. I'll talk about how and when I made the vagina in a bit...but several years must pass first.

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